Giving Tree and rambling about "stuff"

So I'm reading over the Spartan newsletter (our elementary school) when I came across a little blurb about the "Giving Tree". I thought to myself, "Oh cool, maybe we can give something...that was a good book..." I read on to see what they would be collecting...money...coats....new toys all wrapped up...surely we could give something. What I read was a reality check for me. Our school was not going to be collecting to GIVE. They would be filling out forms to RECEIVE. Apparently another local elementary school "adopts" our school during the Christmas season and they provide gifts to all the children attending the school as well as their siblings.



Now, I don't plan on filling out a form. It's just that I am not usually on the receiving end, other than with our parents. It has been a real eye opener for us this past 2 months as we've moved into our first home and Jim has lost his job. We are literally living day by day. I have no idea how our bills are going to be paid or our mortgage for that matter. Jim is doing some side jobs but it's not a full time job with benefits.



In a strange way I am experiencing a sense of Freedom because there are some things that we simply cannot do. For instance...a man came to the door selling magazines, normally we would be suckered into buying one because we can't say no, or we are trying not to be rude or whatever. But now, it's just plain and simple....We have NO money, sorry, can't help ya, good luck at the next house, buh-bye! Some things aren't as pleasant like telling a kid they can't do something their friends are doing because we can't afford it. But there is also a relief, I don't have to buy some kid I've never met a present or waste my gas driving to some bounce house place 20 miles away. I'm probably not explaining this how I really mean it. So I'll just say that it has been nice to not feel guilty about not doing everything, buying everything, etc... there's no pretending or making up excuses. It is what it is and I can be myself. Such Freedom!! (breathe in deep, exhale and the shoulders relax)



I've also been cleaning out our stuff. I've been letting go of A LOT! Today I went through our gazillion containers of toys. Not only did I let go of some "good" toys, I also let go of my perfectionism. No longer is each type of toy in it's own container. I didn't even count to make sure all the pieces to things were there. I even got rid of some playsets....but kept a few pieces! (i.e. we got rid of a pirate ship but kept the pirates) I let go of stuff that I've had since I was a kid...classic stuff...remember when weebles were like an inch or so big? Now they are like 3 inches! Did you have one of these?

I have been hanging on to things, because I know as soon as I let them go I'm gonna need 'em and I sure as heck don't want to spend money on something I already had! BUT I am on the road to Freedom! I am letting go! It helps when the kids have broken, chewed on or destroyed the stuff too...like the items in this picture. It's hard to tell, but, part of Leonardo's bandanna has been chewed off, the Hunchback of Notre Dame view master disc is shaped like a taco, Capt. Hook has lost part of his sword, the shark's tail fin has been chewed off, the knight's sword has been chewed off, Little John is holding a key...that has been chewed up, Tinkerbell's feet have been chewed off, Peter Pan's sword is chewed up and yet another Jerome Bettus has been injured in our home. Poor Jerome has lost a leg!

These are only a few items found in a miscellaneous box this afternoon, I can't imagine how many more toys have been sacrificed to the great tooth god in my son's mouth. ho-hum. Guess it's time to say Buh-Bye to these toys.

I gotta go to bed, church starts in like 6 hours!