Happy Face Stickers

Tomorrow is the big day! Minnie Pearl and Grizabella go in for surgery! We are looking forward to sleeping without the howling and jumping over our heads to get in the window 45 times a night! Thanks to Grizabella's previous owners and a dear friend of mine the cost of both surgeries is covered.

The SUN is out! Yippeee!!!

BHS Area Concert last night. They played a song from "The Incredibles". Taking pictures at these band concerts has never been easy. Leesha is in the percussion and therefore always in the back. She also takes after her mom and was given a greater sense of humor to make up for her (our) lack of height. This is a typical picture with only her head showing, we usually wait until afterwards to take pictures.
Isaac got some new stickers. Happy face stickers.

I guess I should of made sure he had paper to put them on.

Camellias. Not Roses. Look similar but there are no thorns and the flowers are much wider when fully bloomed. I'm just excited to have flowers!

just some thoughts

Sometimes I get such pleasure in torturing my children...Jade and Zack that is. I get so tired of them fighting that sometimes I just make them *HUG*. This time I had my camera. I have 7-8 pictures plus some video footage of this "torture". I see it only fitting for them to hug each other when they've been mean and nasty to each other. It's a good way to "share the love" that is there........deep deep deep down inside. At times they are like best friends, laughing and playing and having fun. Other times it's a battle zone, you don't want to get near. It's a sacred thing though, with special privileges. Jade and Zack may say mean things, beat on each other and do things that tick the other off but NO ONE else may do so. I understand this completely. It is the same with my brother. He can be the biggest jerk or the nicest guy, we can fight and argue or just not talk to each other...but if anyone were to try to talk bad about him....they'd better be on the look out for me. That is my privilege and mine alone. I am his only sister and only I have the backstage pass to that show. I am the only one allowed in the (boxing) ring. Therefore I deal with Jade and Zack uniquely, making sure they are reminded and aware of how precious their relationship is. Besides, it's just plain funny watching them *HUG* when it's the last thing they want to do.

Our neighbors have this tree in their front yard that they have decorated with water bottles. Different sizes and styles of water, Gatorade etc... bottles all filled with water and hanging from the tree. Why is that??? It's funny. But why??

My parents took us to Denny's the other day and brought me these beautiful daffodils! I can't wait to get my garden going! We have not been here through all the seasons yet and have been surprised by the different plants and flowers that have popped up out of nowhere, to show off their beauty. We also have an orange tree, grapes (w/seeds...what's the point?), an apricot tree and two nut trees. I have no idea how to care for them, but I am becoming really good at using Google so maybe I'll find some info there. I can't wait to fill my yard with Shasta Daisies and Zinnia's. I'd like to try Sunflowers. I like the wildflowers, and I like them to grow wild, not confined to a pot or a specific spot....let 'em grow FREE!!

Isaac's face is looking pretty good, especially above his lip. There is still a big knot underneath the scar on his cheek, that I hope and pray will fade away with time. It needs to be massaged but I don't like touching it when I put the lotion on. It creeps me out.

Time for a haircut of sorts I think.

Harley/Jade

Harley managed to get herself caught in a plastic bag. We took advantage of her sad situation (by recording her instead of removing the bag) and have since used it several times to bring about great laughter in the house! This is the last of the video clips, after she somersaults across the floor she is freed from the bag and runs down the hall.

I went in the girl's room to take pictures of their out of control messy room. Jade was told a week ago she had to take care of the clothes but had yet to do so. I told her I was going to blog about her messy room and invite all her friends to read about it. This is Jade's response. I of course don't want to draw attention from the health dept. so I won't be blogging about her room. (you can't see the carpet, it's covered with clothes...dirty and clean! SCREAM!!!)

And just so you know she is laughing not crying as I thought she should've been! lol!!

What's up with you? Well......

We got our new toilet in. It's a little too fancy for us and Naissa is somewhat afraid of it. Instead of a handle it has two buttons in the form of a circle on the top. (see picture below) Apparently the smaller side is for flushing pee and the larger side is for flushing poo or you can push both at the same time. I guess it is for saving water, but frankly I feel more comfortable just pushing them both at the same time! (too much information I know....sorry)

This is just a typical find in the Loper household. Soap with toothpaste squeezed out on it. What makes me laugh is that this particular bar of soap has been used to "wash out the mouth" of a particular child. (yes, it's from bath & body and it's scented cucumber melon...not exactly your everyday Zest or Dial but you make do with what you have) I have talked with my kids about having minty fresh mouths, by brushing their teeth but also by speaking "clean" words, words that build up not tear down. So I find it funny that there is minty fresh toothpaste on the soap that was used to "remove" the unclean words said by my child. Poor Crush! He has had to put up with so much. The latest turtle trauma happened two nights ago while I was on the phone. It was a short phone conversation but apparently not short enough. I hung up the phone and sat on the couch not really thinking much about the fact that Naissa and Isaac were not in plain sight. Only after I heard the sound of water splashing did it dawn on me, that something was not right. I turned toward the turtle to find Naissa and Isaac with their hands in the tank (Eeewww!!) with water dripping down the outside of the tank and onto the floor. I jumped up and hollered, "What the French Toast???" as the look of horror crossed both my face and theirs. "Salmonella! Wash Your Hands! Get Out of the Turtle Tank! Where's the poor Turtle?? What are you thinking?? WHY?? What the French Toast??? Wash Your Hands....and Arms and Faces and Clothes!!" The tank has a filter but it's rather temperamental, and does not work as it should. Therefore the tank is always on the verge of yuck! Well, not only did they have their hands and arms in the tank splashing the water all over the place, they also thought the turtle might like to join them in a game of "Perfection". Most of the pieces from the game were sitting on the bottom of the tank, along with 2 Tonka cars and some shredded toilet paper. I still don't know why the toilet paper. Poor Crush just hid out under the basking platform, thank goodness he didn't try to eat one of the game pieces!!

Most of the time Naissa can be so sweet, cute, funny and JOYFUL....other times I blame Jim. (hee hee!) I often think of the old poem that my granny used to recite to me! (Hmmm?! I wonder why?)

There was a little girl who had a little curl,

right in the middle of her forehead.

When she was good she was very, very good,

but when she was bad she was horrid.

Jade and her friend Rachel walked to Walgreens, where Rachel bought them both a HUGE stuffed Valentines Bear (on clearance). The only problem was having to walk back home carrying the bears in their arms for 1/4 of a mile.

When we bought this house it had been sitting without care for quite some time. Many of the plants didn't make it. We have this little tree-like bush in our front yard that I've never given much thought, just assuming it was a leaf only tree. I was wrong! The old saying, never judge a book by its cover, goes for plants and trees too. A few days ago a friend of mine made a comment about my rose buds. I looked at her puzzled and asked her what she was talking about. She pointed to the "plain leaf only tree" which now had several buds as well as an open rose on it!! What Joy!!

We did not stay outside and watch it but we did go out and check it a couple of times....the eclipse of the moon, the moon eclipse, however you say it. Sad to say the only thing I know about an eclipse is the song by Bonnie Tyler "Total Eclipse of the Heart (1984). But that's what google is for now days right?

Isaac and Reed, playing with Pez and watching Treasure Planet at Grandma Cathy's.

What do you get when you give two 3 year olds a few minutes to themselves??

Jesus is God

After hitting the snooze button for almost an hour, I finally turned it off and sat up so as not to fall back to sleep. As I sat there I mentally started going through the never ending list of things I needed to do today. If you're a stay at home mom, or a mom of any sorts, you know the list well. I hardly ever get through it. (hence the "never ending" part) So each morning starts out overwhelming and full of dread because it's the same thing everyday. I thought I would get in the shower before waking Naissa and Isaac up this morning. I slowly got myself out of bed and started walking towards the bathroom when the little girl who was sleeping in my bed cried out, "Jesus is God!" and curled up on her side as peaceful as could be. It was just what I needed to change my focus and as I showered I found myself Thanking Him (Jesus)and wondering what she was dreaming about that would cause her to cry out that Jesus is God! But then the "list" creeped its way back in reminding me of all I needed to do.......my mind must of been in a fighting mood for a song from when I was young came to mind. I don't know the title but what I remember goes like this....

Love Him in the morning when you see the sun arising
Love Him in the evening 'cuz He took you through the day
And in the in between time when you feel the pressure comin'
Remember that He loves you and He promises to stay

When you think you've got to worry
'Cuz it seems the thing to do
Remember He ain't in a hurry
He's always got time for you (and me so.....)
repeat

That's what I will remember today.

The video below

My good friend Virginia sent me the video below (Frozen Grand Central) and I just got such a kick out of it I had to share! I am so thankful for friends and funny videos! lol! Thanks Virginia!!

Frozen Grand Central

REDNECK PARTY AT THE LOPER'S

Remember how our toliet broke, due to a little someone flushing a little something down it that shouldn't off been flushed?? Well we got a new toilet, so we had a little party to see what was stuck inside. Here are a few pictures from the party. The first one is of what we found inside.

And Yes, this party was out on our front lawn!!

A couple of months ago Naissa wrote on the wall with a black permanent marker. Until the weather gets warmer and we get the paint back out for touch ups I've come up with a way to "disguise" the marker.....well....kinda ?

late night ramblings of a woman who should be in bed

I went to Target because we were out of a couple of crucial items. Upon my departure I bribed the kids to pick up the stuff on the kitchen floor that they had dumped and messed earlier. I love that a box of fruit snacks is like gold to them, it makes for cheap treasures!
When I got home I saw a gray cat in our front yard. I slowly got out of the car but the cat still ran and jumped our fence. I walked in the front door and asked if all the cats were in. No one knew. I grabbed my flashlight and headed to the backyard. The cat had jumped the fence on the side where Jim’s shed is so I headed that way, scanning the yard with my little light. As I got closer I started calling Grizzy’s name. Something crashed, but the shed takes up the whole side yard so it’s not easy to get to the front. I called Grizzy’s name again and sure enough she came running and meowing right into my arms! (God please don’t let her get pregnant!!) Maybe I will be able to call this next week to get her in to the low-cost spay/neuter clinic. It’s about $40 and we have two cats that need spayed, so that’s $80 (maybe I should’ve been a math major, lol!!) but that’s $80 we don’t have. We have been living on a wing and a prayer, as they say. I thought we’d been broke and poor before…HA!! This beats all! I know we are in “transition” but for goodness sake how long does “transition” last?? How long until the resentment kicks in from those loved ones who have been making our ends meet? We have to say no to everything extra, even some that seem to be the basics.

My parents gave me a fresh fruit basket for Valentines Day and everybody else got candy. The reason was not because they thought I shouldn’t have candy but because when my mom asked me what I wanted I said fresh fruit. We rarely have it. Well, my kids, especially the younger two, were more interested in my gift than their candy. They asked me for a grape and soon there were none, the plums were gone, the bananas….only a couple of apples and a pear remain. It makes me sad and mad at the same time. How much do we take for granted? I surely never thought when asked what I wanted for Valentines, I would really want fruit??? I wanted fruit. And God provided. He used my mom & dad to meet that need. Yes, I consider it a need not just a want.

Our toilet broke….another story…..but we couldn’t go out and buy another one. We couldn’t even just replace the bottom part which is something like $25!! We just all used the back toilet that the cats had taken over as their personal drinking fountain. And God provided. A friend of Jim’s who works in some sort of construction, came across one, an expensive one that a guy changed out….not because it was broken or gross either, and we got it for free. God provided. I consider a toilet…even a second toilet….in a house of 6 a need.

Those are just two stories from this week. Many more have occurred. Some I may not of recognized God’s mighty hand in. I’ve been playing the bitter, angry and depressed child. I’ve been down in my pit only able to see my walls of dirt, too depressed to even throw myself a pity party! Sad, I know, pathetic even. I don’t feel I have what it takes to change anything. That frustrates me. I have added gray hairs to my head just waiting for things to change. The only thing I can do is change my attitude….and that ain’t been easy. In fact it still sucks. I don’t wait well. So I yell at the sky, Am I supposed to learn to wait? Is that why I’m doing nothing but waiting?? If I learn to wait will everything fall back in to place? I’ve been waiting so long I’ve forgotten what I’m waiting for!!

What I do know is that money is more important than I feel like I’m supposed to think it is. (make sense?) Money is needed for everything. Money is what the preachers always say they don’t like to talk about and yet they do….and they do for weeks at a time. How much you should give, when, why, where, to whom…what you should do with your money, money is the root of all evil…..no the love of money is the root of all evil…money money money.
It’s easy for those who have it to tell others what they should do with theirs. Everywhere I go I am bombarded with fund raisers and mission letters. Please help so and so go here and there. There’s nothing wrong with them I’m just frustrated that I can’t do anything about them. I have nothing to give.

On Oprah, the lady (?) said there is always money. She hasn’t been to our checkbook.
Unemployment checks didn’t come. Money from jobs not coming in. Bills pouring in. 6 months behind. Barely staying above water, choking on it often. Feel a leg cramp coming on.
Still waiting for Contractor’s license to come. Many things dependant on that license number.
Recipients of food baskets. Sick of beans and macaroni. Still have to afford milk and bread. Occasional apples.
This is my sob story. Does that mean a son of a bitch story? Cuz it is!
I splurged and bought two boxes of fruit snacks tonight at Target. I figured we don’t have enough money to pay the bills, what’s $3 to bribe my kids. Actually $3 is a gallon of milk (almost) or a loaf of bread (of which we go through one a day (almost)
Thank God for free lunches at school. I think I can actually Thank God for medi-cal too. If it weren’t for medi-cal, my kids would be uninsured like me and Jim.

This has been hard socially as well as emotionally. I have isolated myself. Especially from my church friends, whom I miss, but with them come others. Others who seem to like to put their feet in their mouths. I just can’t be around all the seemingly fake Praise You Jesus every 2 minutes. Nor do I want their opinions and stories of when they went through the exact same thing and how they had to let their Nanny and housekeeper go! I can’t afford to go to lunch or get a baby sitter or go to the movies. I can’t afford to go to Starbucks. I don’t want everyone to know we have no money. I am embarrassed. I don’t want people to feel like they have to pay for me for anything. I don’t want them to resent me. I choose to stay away rather than risk some form of rejection. Not being invited or included, because they know I have no money and they are doing things that require some money. What do I have to offer? I am at place I am neither comfortable with nor wish to leave. I just go through the motions of life and who I am slowly fades into the mundane .

Of course I speak in general and of many things all in one, I am my own worst critic. I have been told I am very hard on myself. It’s true.
I fear the unknown and yet it drives me at the same time. I have received many questionnaires in the last few months…through myspace, and e-mails. One of the questions that has appeared on many of them is, “What are you afraid of?” I think that my biggest fear is finally being myself, who I was created to be and having that person…ME….be rejected in some way. I take risks daily of being rejected by people in my path but to risk rejection with the ones you love and care about is almost haulting. It is almost better to live distant, believing what I want than knowing for sure what others think and feel about me…whether they like me or want to know me.

I'm tired and have left many of my thoughts incomplete. Maybe I will finish them later, or maybe I will just let them go.
I probably shouldn't blog in the middle of the night when I've been stressed out and fighting a losing battle with a nasty cold....I am a natural rambler but under these other circumstances it's obviously a lot worse! So please don't read anything into this, don't put your name in because chances are if you are reading my blog, you aren't one of "those" people in my life.

By the way, the spell check isn't working and I am too tired to check myself...sorry.

February 14-15, 2008

Yesterday was Valentines Day so I shouldn't of been surprised

at the gift of love left outside the door by our cat.

Grizabella (who is currently in heat and awaiting her appointment with the vet) disappeared sometime before school. I was woke from peaceful slumber by Jim calling Grizzy's name over and over. He couldn't find her. I got up to help. To make this story shorter I will just tell you that I went outside to look for her, thinking there was no way she could've gotten out, but she wasn't in the house. I walked around the house to the cat door, that's when I noticed the bird gift and I noticed that the screen was down on the outside vent. (Watch out Horatio Caine there's a new CSI in town) When I looked closer I saw gray cat hair...so I began to call Grizzy's name. Right away I heard a meow and then another and another and then her little gray nose poked through the opening. I was so happy she came to me. I wasn't sure she would because we haven't had her that long and we changed her name and all. I was able to pick her up and take her in the house, where she spent the next 1/2 an hour meowing to go back out!
So after taking Naissa to school, Isaac and I went to the Loper's (which I guess is technically us too but my in-laws still hold the title) My nephews Finn and Reed were over there and Isaac wanted to give them some Valentines. The boys got out the swords and had a blast playing. Isaac wore a ninja turtle mask that I think was made for BIG kids because of where the eye holes are located. But I think he looks cute anyway.
Reed with his swords.
Finn's surprise attack on the "cave"

Zack did it again! Today he received his Block T award. This kid just keeps amazing me. And the thing is, it's coming from within him, not from us. He wants to get all A's and learn and do well in school. He is the one that gets upset over a miscellaneous "D" or an "F" because he forgot to put his name on the paper. I am the one who could care less as long as he learns the needed concept. Anyway, here is is with his friend Dylan(who is trying to hide the cookie in his mouth) with their Block T awards! Yes, I am proud.

Papa Murphy's U-bake HEART shaped pizzas. Look better than they taste.

This picture is on here for a little game I like to call, "What's Wrong With This Picture??"

See if you can see it...

Today/Tonight was the 2nd Drum Show, this time at Clovis North. (side note: They really

need a light rather than a stop sign at Willow and Shepherd) Alta got 3rd and Buchanan got 2nd. Most of my pictures turned out to look a lot like the previous ones so I will spare you the 45 pictures I took.

Well, I'm still sick and I'm really tired so this is the best I've got for now.

Happy Valentines Day!!

I've not had the mind to blog these past few days. I've been fighting the same cold that many others have been fighting....but I've been losing the fight! What's up with that? I am so tired of constantly gagging and coughing on the "yuck" that's flowing down the back of my sore throat!
Today is Valentines Day and I don't even want to give Jim a kiss because I hate it when he's sick!! (and since I'm sick....he would most likely catch what I've got)
We waited until the last minute to go get the kids their Valentines for school, which caused us all to stay up later tearing apart, signing, folding, adding tattoo, sticker & candy to each Valentine. By the time we finished, my second wind had kicked in and here I am the only one awake, at 2am. Even the cats are asleep. I suppose it doesn't help that I turned on the computer....
so off it goes!
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!

Today...

Today was family Bunko day. Enjoyable.

We had planned on going back to church today but ended up only sending Jade and Zack. It's hard to go back, to want to go back after 6 months. We are in a stage in our lives, where we just need to be fed, we need to hear a good sermon, some good worship music, have some good fellowship, fill up! We have been through some hard times...virtually alone (except for our parents and a friend or two) It's hard to go back to church, where nobody knows (and may not even care) that we are not the same as we were the last time they saw us. I am harder. I am tired. I am worn out. I am tired of being tired and worn out. I fight bitterness daily. As well as resentment and jealousy. I cry out "It's not fair!" but nothing changes...because life is not fair. I struggle with fear, whether it be rational or not, it does not matter. Many are experiencing life's hardships. I am not elite or special in this. I just wish I handled it better.

"I laugh because I must not cry that is all, that is all."

"If I did not laugh, I should die"

Both quotes that I love by Abraham Lincoln.

Then again, I love many things that people say. Maybe I'll share some later.

The sound of ripping paper is in the hall...

We have discovered several pieces of paper, homework and sheets of music, with holes and rips and tears. On closer examination those holes were found to be made by TEETH! Not knowing who the culpret was, we had to let it go.....until we heard the sound of someone ripping paper in the hall way. I went to the doorway hoping to catch them in the act, but no one was in the hall. I waited....Josiah came walking from other end of the hallway, Harley and Isaac were already in my room, Naissa and Zack were in the front room and Jade was in her room...that left three!

Jim wouldn't make a mess of shredded paper....so that left two!

Harley and Josiah were innocent. Harley should be able to get her cone and stitches removed tomorrow (Monday) and Josiah...well, he just warms my heart because he is so much like Zeke. He has taken to Harley as if she were his mom.

Grizabella ("gray beauty") did not have an alibi and I've seen her go after and take paper balls from Isaac when we were playing basketball with wads of paper. Hmmm?! She went into heat today! She is not quiet about it either!

Minnie Pearl, has since been CAUGHT tearing up with her claws and ripping with her teeth one of Naissa's papers. Jade also caught her putting teeth marks in a 75 year old copy of Little Men!!

GUILTY!!

Minnie is also in heat, and she sounds like a pigeon...

Lucky us! It's true, there is no such thing as a "FREE" kitten!

WHY???

Can you tell what this is? This is our dishwasher door (kinda sideways), you know where you put the soap in? Yep! Is that soap in there? Nope! Ya wanna know what it is? It's egg shells and kitty treats!! Why you ask? I haven't got a clue!!

Toilets should come with a heimlich button!!

Jim had to take the toilet apart today. This is not our first experience doing this. I'm not sure what the attraction is to putting things in the toilet, but there has been a strong attraction running through our 3 year old lately. We have fished out numerous toys (little men, cars, a transformer bath toys etc...), a couple of toothbrushes, a jump rope, clothing, wash cloths as well as countless soaps (liquid and bars), shaving cream, toothpaste, bug repellant, sunscreen and gobs of toilet paper. This time we found nothing...er...I mean...Jim found nothing. He snaked it several times, had the hose running through the window, took it apart, all except for smashing the darn thing and it still has something clogging it up somewhere inside! Money has been more than tight, practically non existent, so you can imagine my joy at hearing we might have to buy a new toilet! Isaac, with no shame in his voice, announced that he had put "just a couple of sticks" in the toilet. When I asked when he did this he said, "On Thursday I did it" (Can't help but laugh) So we may have a stick stuck in the toilet and that stick may cost us $50-$300 bucks (personally, I just want a toilet that does what it's supposed to do).

Thank God we have two bathrooms. Besides the fact that the cats have taken over the 2nd one, we still have a place "to go". Would it help if we laid hands on the commode and asked God for healing? (I'm being sincere)

On the Pollyanna side of this...if we have to buy a new toilet we can "go" knowing that only Loper buns have sat on it! :o)